My advisor nominated me for a fellowship, one that pays my tuition. I’m happy, don’t get me wrong, but it is second best to a TA position. I’m in comparative lit and he only gets to recommend two a year to the English department and while he can nominate more to the foreign language, he has already promised from last year the only spot available for Latin. He says not to worry, that next year, 2007 I will get the Latin TA position for beg I and II. I’m okay with that, but then there’s the price of going to school and I have a house back in my home town that I have to keep up and pay on and of course pay over priced rent here and my son isn’t working, he is recovering from CHF, and my husband is on short term disability and not drawing a whole check, so our funds are dwindling. The fellowship will be nice, it will save me over 4000 bucks a semester, that’s great. But, I still feel let down. I know, I know, I will get my chance to teach, but I want to do it now. I might do some substitute teaching in the fall. Yes, that’s what I will do. Sometimes, things just don’t go as well as I planned, but on the bright side, if I had gotten a TA position this semester, I would have been fucked, since I am having surgery over spring break. How to do all the TA work and write two papers and recover from surgery all in five days? Won’t happen. So, I’m glad I am just worrying about school. Things always have a way of working out. I am sorta thinking of transferring to the MFA program, sorta. I can still submit my stuff; just don’t know if I want to abandon Comparative lit, which I love so much. I won’t think about that now, instead, I’ll have another overpriced cookie. Yes, dammit, they are like sex, a lot of hoopla and then it’s over.